Marital Advice – Relationship Tips From Our Hearts to Yours
Whether we’ve been married for a
few minutes or several decades, when we hear marriage advice, relationship tips or divorce prevention measures, we never want to believe that WE are the ones that need to hear it.
We can always think of OTHERS that could benefit from the advice…but us?
I had an epiphany on Valentine’s Day this year.
It was a year where our day was busy with all things non-Valentine’s and Feb. 14th snuck up on us. Not even a card was exchanged between us and the chocolates my husband bought for me were an afterthought as we needed to stop at WalMart for coolant for our van anyway. He bought me Turtles. My favorite. We joked about our casual approach to Valentine’s and promised ourselves to stop later at Tim Horton’s for their Valentine’s special as a gift to each other. (We ended up stopping for simple ice cream at McDonald’s instead, so that the kids had a structure to play on 😉 .)
That wasn’t the epiphany. It was so nice to be so comfortable with the husband whom I love so much and that I didn’t feel inadequate because of a forgotten Valentine’s. I thought of how strong our marriage was, that we could be OK just knowing we loved each other without needing to romance each other.
The epiphany came as we sat down to a fast food supper with a good friend. My husband forgot to get an order of onion rings instead of fries for me. I usually get fries. But today I wanted onion rings. Sure, my husband had extra things to think about, ordering for our friend as well and such. But I wanted onion rings and he forgot. It was going to be a “Valentine’s” gesture for me to get onion rings (which cost more) instead of the fries. Part of our love for each other.
And what happened in me? I felt betrayed, unloved, as if he was self-absorbed and uncaring! The emotions continued a bit later as he continued chatting with his friend while I managed the kids that were getting stir-crazy and wanted to be more active (we weren’t at McDonald’s yet). Didn’t he notice we needed to go? Couldn’t he cut his time with his friend short so that his wife wasn’t so stressed with the kids? Didn’t he care? Why was I always so attentive to his needs and he never to mine?
Well…I’m ashamed of my thought pattern even as I write it. You can see that there is much that needs to be transformed in me.
And that’s the conclusion that I came to as I journaled about it when we got home. There is much that I need to deal with to be more loving to my husband.
But the other conclusion that I came to was this… If I can go from being so happy and feeling so blessed by our relationship to a feeling of betrayal and stress in a matter of a few hours…WE need to work on our marriage too. WE need to protect it as if our lives depended on it.
Our lives DO depend on it.
As moms, as wives, our daily lives are deeply impacted by the health of our marriages. So at times we need to seek that advice, relationship tips to help us along the way or through a rough patch. We need to guard our hearts and our marriages from apathy and other temptations.
So, join us, as we share tips that have helped us on our continuous journey toward the marital bliss of fairy tales and the dedicated love of the Bible. By now, we all know it simply takes hard work. But the results are worth it! So worth it!!
Towards our marital bliss 😉 …